Monday, July 14, 2014

So Whatever Happened to "Jesspa?"

Remember this post? It was all about some girl named Jess and her Vespa scooter and a post on the infamous adventure motorcycling mega forms ADVrider.com where some guy discovered her blog and her plan to motor west and the ensuing trash talk that took place.

Then I followed up with this post because once I linked to her blog, Jess followed that link back to me and I had a brief chance to chit chat with her personally and discover more about her.

I liked her. I wanted good things for her. I wanted her to go on her trip and discover that she's made of better stuff than she knew.

I wanted her to set a positive example for all the young women who hear nothing but "you can't," "it's not safe for a girl," and other dream killing bullshit that people lob at us whether they mean it "that way" or not.

So what happened?

She didn't go.

She caved to Real Life pressures and set backs and allowed them to talk her out of her dream. She registered on ADVrider just so that she could post in the thread about her and tell the smelly boys (and girls) something to the extent of "I hope you're happy."

Which-- naturally-- wasn't exactly the point of all the trash talk to begin with. So "happy" might not be the appropriate word, but: Way to prove them all right, Jess. Way to live down to peoples' expectations of you. Way to live down to your expectations of yourself.

Then she set comments on her blog so they had to be approved, then she just made the whole thing private.

I had hoped she would at least go back to the drawing board: rethink her trip timing and her budget; save up some of her own money; try again.

Instead-- she seems to have simply disappeared. Folded up her ideal and quietly crawled back into obscurity.

My heart breaks for her loss in doing so. The adventure she will not have, what she won't learn about herself, the reinforcement of her lack of self confidence.

But it's her life and her decision.

If you want to read some great blog stuff from and about real life, every day females to whom it never occurred to listen to a bunch of nay sayers tell them what they can't do, I recommend catching up on these:

http://www.feyala.net/
http://nomadgals-klr650-adventure.blogspot.com/

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